It’s [beauty] a kind of radiance. People who possess a true inner beauty, their eyes are a little brighter, their skin a little more dewy. They vibrate at a different frequency.
The Size Zero Myth:
Myth #1. If a person is beautiful, it’s easy for them to find their way around everyone. So, if I am not beautiful physically, I am doomed.
Myth #2. I need everyone around me to appreciate and accept me. If not, it means I am not perfect.
Myth #3. If I look good, wear good and possess good things, people will accept me. If not, they will reject me.
The Wise Hero Reality:
There’s no doubt about the fact that in this world, you’re better off being good-looking. Attractive people are judged more favourably, treated better, and cut more slack at all ages and in all walks of life. Teachers favour more attractive students, attractive adults have better success in dating and mating and bosses favour the more attractive employee.
But is it all that matters or is there something else which is greater and more powerful than outer beauty?
Why does outer beauty attract us?
We humans have a deep desire to be around accurate, perfect & beautiful people. It is ingrained in our minds that outside appearance has a lot of importance.
Physiologically, the first time we meet someone the only aspect which is immediately noticeable is how does the other person look. Even though most of us are not consciously aware of the stimuli that make us like the company of beautiful people.
Why do we stress so much towards becoming beautiful on the outside?
In today’s world, we take a lot of stress in achieving that perfect outer appearance we aim for. But have we ever realised why are we so worried about how we look on the outside?
The reason is very simple, but many of us are unaware of it. We need acceptance and appreciation from others to feel comfortable and nice. To achieve that state of comfort we feel we need to work towards outer perfection.
We have a deep belief system that when people appreciate and accept us it signifies we are good. If they reject us, we are not impeccable.
We also think if we are beautiful and perfect, it would be easier for us to influence others and get attention. Attention is an addiction and leads to constant dependency, fear and insecurity.
Inner vs Outer Beauty:
Beauty is skin deep, what lies beneath the surface…
If you look good externally, you will feel good inside, but you need to remember that external beauty is not permanent. You will age soon, and not look the same. If your happiness parameter is based on your outer beauty, you will never succeed in feeling good after you lose your outer appearance.
Inner beauty is eternal, constant, not dependent; a feeling of happiness, peace and serenity without an expiration date.
Stop Comparing Your Beauty & Yourself to Others…
Stop comparing yourself with others because you will feel inferior. You might be beautiful, but you will always find someone who has something better than you. For example, you might have beautiful long hair or good skin, but there will definitely be someone who will have better hair or skin than you. You will be disappointed if you base your happiness upon these parameters.
You might work hard and achieve what you have aimed for but few people will appreciate your achievement and few will not, then as you are programmed since childhood that if others appreciate you, only then you are good, you will not feel happy.
We need to understand that everyone is unique, then why do we need to compare ourselves with others?
We need to embrace ourselves both on the outside and inside.
Remember who you really are…
How you view yourself is very important. If you think you are the physical body, you will always be worried about unnecessary things.
You need to always remember that you are a soul, hence you need to be beautiful inside. External beauty will be achieved if you are beautiful inside as that will lead you to peace, calm, serenity and happiness. The intelligent body will create such chemicals and make you more beautiful on the outside.
Should I stop taking care of my external body?
When we talk about inner beauty and its importance, automatically a question crosses our minds that, “Should I stop taking care of my external aspects like skin, hair etc?”
The answer to the question is NO. Do take care of yourself externally, but make sure you are happy internally. Do not only focus on external beauty. And definitely, do not base your happiness upon external beauty parameters.
How inner beauty affects outer beauty…
It has been scientifically proven that if internal state of mind is good and we are happy from inside, the external body will benefit, as similar chemicals will be generated.
For example, if you are tense, this might affect your body in a negative way and lead to conditions like hypo thyroid where your weight will increase. Whereas people who have an internal sense of fulfilment will have better glow outside as similar chemicals will be generated. That is why we observe that saint and people who meditate have better glace on their face than any other person.
The importance of inner beauty is 80% and if we succeed in achieving that, we will see that remaining 20% of outer beauty can be automatically achieved without much effort.
In short, we can say that good thought leads to generating good hormones hence results in good skin and outer beauty. Lifestyle at the level of thought affects skin and external body.
Have you ever wondered why you feel good around certain people and not very comfortable around few other people regardless of how they look? Well, the answer to that is very simple. Our comfort level around any person we meet depends upon their vibrations (energy which soul radiates).
When you meet someone, who has good nature you are attracted to them, in other words, you find them beautiful. No physical aspect is influencing your mind when you say those words. It is the soul you are talking about.
If you meet someone who is beautiful from the outside, but internally not a good person, you will not get good vibrations from them and would not want to be around them. This applies to everyone. No one likes to be around people who radiate negative vibrations in-spite of how good they look.
Your vibrations are so powerful that it can influence how someone perceives you or feels about you.
If you are depressed from the inside and not accepting yourself physically, then when you meet people, you radiate similar negative vibrations (energy field of rejection). This energy field of yours will be sensed by anyone you meet. Your internal state is negative, which does not attract others, hence you will not get the acceptance of others as well. So basically, you are rejecting yourself, hence others will reject you too. The vibrations you radiate will come back to you from others as well.
When others reject me, I think it’s because I am fat, hence I am getting negative vibration. But in reality, it is not because of that. It is because my vibration is of rejection; self-abuse is what I will get from others.
I guess many of you must have heard about Helen Keller. She was deaf and blind but she felt good about herself as she quoted,
“God has given me a good brain. Cos of my physical condition people get attracted towards me and help in charity so I can help others more.”
This is called being positive and radiating positive energy.
When I perceive someone, there are two aspects involved:
- Physical aspect- which I can see,
- Energy field- an aura which I can feel.
We can see beauty so we think that’s what matters, but deep down we all are souls and we can feel the energy field of other souls. Someone might be very beautiful on the outside and I might not feel good about them and vice versa. You cannot detach from the vibration.
Attitude is everything:
Have you ever met people who are not externally perfect, but they still attract us? They basically do not care much about how they look and accept themselves, hence they attract other people easily with their confidence and positive vibrations. I can think of one such person easily- Mindy Kaling. She is my role model I must say because of the way she handles body shaming comments so confidently. Hence, she has millions of fans.
Strangely, I have noticed that people who are close to perfection are the ones who are mostly obsessed with how they look. They are never satisfied hence their energy field is deteriorated.
Remember, you are on a journey, you need to be satisfied at every step. Don’t stop putting effort on the outside, but also remember not to be always dissatisfied inside. If so you will never feel good about yourself. Accept yourself the way you are and do not let others opinion about you matter. Remember, you cannot change the outer appearance much, but internally you can aim to become beautiful.
The true meaning of BEAUTY:
On an outer level, we all know the definition of beauty, but have you ever dug deep and tried decoding what it really means? Let me simplify it for you.
- Being SLIM does not mean not being physically overweight. It actually means being light from inside and not holding on to grudges.
- FAIR means no spots on the soul, being clean from inside without jealousy towards anyone.
- FLAWLESS SKIN means purity from inside, purity of thoughts for everyone.
- SMILE is just not to look happy on the outside. Smile and be happy from inside. The soul needs to be at bliss.
When such inner beauty is achieved you will feel:
- Serenity inside.
- Peace in the state of mind
- Feel good and satisfied from inside.
Appreciation for outer appearance might not make you like someone. But when someone truly sees your inner beauty and appreciates it, you will like being with that someone as those are genuine positive vibrations. The attraction of thoughts and belief are the only base of a long-term relationship as outer beauty fades.
Now don’t get confused about the fact that you have to work on your inner beauty for yourself. Inner beauty is for you and not because you want acceptance from people.
We need to understand ourselves, evaluate ourselves and stop judging ourselves with others mindset.
Spirituality teaches us that everyone looks at you with their own perspective. What people must say, we must listen to it, but finally, we have to evaluate it.
People evaluate our performance with their personality so if someone has the personality of finding fault, even if you are perfect, that is what they will do and if someone’s personality is to find everything perfect they will not find faults even if there are. It’s the way they see things. So, don’t let that influence your confidence.
You need to focus on your own positives and improve your negatives. No one’s perfect, but everyone is working towards it. What others say is not in your control, but what you put yourself through is under your control.
There are certain genetically determined features which we cannot change. If we crib about it, we will always be unhappy. Change the foundation from outer to inner beauty. Take care of yourself physically, but do not over think, else your energy field will become inferior. Externalize your inner beauty.